| Foreword |
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xiii | |
| Acknowledgments |
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xv | |
| Introduction |
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xvii | |
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Causes of Adult Co-Dependency |
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xvii | |
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The Medical Model: No Recovery |
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xix | |
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A New Definition of Freedom |
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xix | |
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Two Traditional Types of Recovery Programs |
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xx | |
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xxi | |
| PART ONE - Co-dependency Revisited |
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1 | (56) |
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Co-dependency: Getting Stuck In Infancy |
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3 | (15) |
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An Overview of the Problem |
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3 | (1) |
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Assumptions of the New Approach |
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4 | (2) |
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A New Definition of Co-dependency |
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6 | (1) |
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Characteristics of Co-dependency |
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7 | (3) |
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Recovery From Co-dependency |
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10 | (1) |
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11 | (1) |
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12 | (4) |
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Awareness Activity: How Co-dependent Are You? |
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16 | (2) |
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The Medical Model: Struck In Hopelessness |
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18 | (8) |
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An Overview of Traditional Approaches |
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18 | (1) |
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Key Assumptions of the Medical Model |
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19 | (1) |
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Traditional Definitions of Co-dependency |
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20 | (1) |
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21 | (1) |
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22 | (2) |
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24 | (1) |
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25 | (1) |
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26 | (11) |
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Dominator vs. Partnership Models |
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26 | (1) |
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27 | (1) |
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28 | (1) |
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The Influence of Christianity |
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29 | (3) |
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32 | (3) |
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The Consciousness Revolution: The Why Behind the Co-dependency Epidemic |
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35 | (2) |
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A Developmental Approach to Recovery |
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37 | (12) |
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Main Principles of a Developmental Approach |
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38 | (1) |
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Four Stages of Relationship |
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39 | (1) |
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Main Developmental Tasks of Early Childhood |
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40 | (1) |
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Bonding: The Critical Task of Co-dependency |
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41 | (2) |
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Separation: The Critical Task of Counter-dependency |
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43 | (2) |
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When the Process Breaks Down |
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45 | (1) |
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46 | (2) |
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48 | (1) |
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The Causes of Co-dependency |
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49 | (8) |
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49 | (2) |
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51 | (1) |
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The Replay in Adult Relationships |
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52 | (1) |
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52 | (2) |
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54 | (2) |
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56 | (1) |
| PART TWO - The Recovery Process |
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57 | (186) |
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59 | (13) |
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59 | (1) |
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Working on Yourself Alone |
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60 | (1) |
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Choosing a Therapist Who Understands |
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61 | (1) |
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Support Groups, Classes and Workshops |
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62 | (1) |
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The Three C's: Committed, Conscious and Cooperative Relationships |
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63 | (1) |
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A New 12-Step Process of Recovery |
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64 | (4) |
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68 | (3) |
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71 | (1) |
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72 | (14) |
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73 | (1) |
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74 | (1) |
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75 | (1) |
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Dishonesty: A Form of Denial |
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76 | (1) |
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77 | (1) |
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The Happy Family Syndrome |
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77 | (1) |
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78 | (1) |
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79 | (1) |
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Tools for Breaking Through Denial |
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80 | (2) |
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82 | (2) |
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84 | (2) |
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Understanding the Causes of Co-dependency |
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86 | (11) |
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Tools for Understanding the Causes of Co-dependency |
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90 | (3) |
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93 | (2) |
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95 | (2) |
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Unraveling Co-dependent Relationships |
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97 | (10) |
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Identifying Co-dependent Patterns |
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97 | (2) |
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99 | (2) |
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Tools for Unraveling Co-dependency |
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101 | (4) |
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105 | (2) |
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I Have Met The Enemy and It Is I |
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107 | (14) |
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The Enemy: Part of Myself |
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108 | (2) |
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110 | (2) |
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Intimacy Begins With Loving Yourself |
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112 | (1) |
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113 | (1) |
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Integrating Internal Parts |
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114 | (1) |
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Tools For Reclaiming Lost Parts |
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115 | (3) |
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118 | (3) |
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121 | (11) |
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121 | (1) |
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122 | (1) |
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123 | (1) |
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123 | (2) |
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125 | (2) |
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127 | (1) |
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Tools for Learning to Love Yourself |
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128 | (2) |
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130 | (2) |
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Giving Up Power and Control Games |
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132 | (15) |
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Passivity: The Master Game of Co-dependency |
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133 | (1) |
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Passive Behaviors and How to Comfront Them Effectively |
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133 | (2) |
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135 | (2) |
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One-Up/One-Down Power Moves |
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137 | (1) |
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Tools for Giving Up Power and Control Games |
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138 | (4) |
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142 | (2) |
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144 | (3) |
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Learning to Ask for What You Want |
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147 | (10) |
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148 | (1) |
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149 | (1) |
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149 | (1) |
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Asking For What You Want: A Nine-Step Process |
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150 | (1) |
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151 | (1) |
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152 | (1) |
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Tools for Learning to Ask for What You Want |
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153 | (2) |
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155 | (2) |
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157 | (9) |
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157 | (3) |
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Co-dependent Ways to Handle Feelings |
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160 | (1) |
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Healthy Ways to Handle Feelings |
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160 | (1) |
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Tools for Learning to Feel Again |
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161 | (3) |
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164 | (2) |
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166 | (14) |
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166 | (4) |
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The Conditions That Stifled the Development of the True Self |
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170 | (1) |
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The Steps in the Progression of Co-dependency |
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171 | (1) |
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171 | (1) |
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Tools for Healing Your Inner Child |
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172 | (4) |
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176 | (4) |
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180 | (14) |
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180 | (1) |
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181 | (1) |
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Daring to be Different From Your Co-dependent Family |
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182 | (1) |
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183 | (1) |
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184 | (1) |
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184 | (1) |
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184 | (3) |
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187 | (2) |
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Thoughts About Boundaries |
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189 | (1) |
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Tools for Building Your Boundaries |
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190 | (2) |
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192 | (2) |
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Forming Bonds of Intimacy |
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194 | (15) |
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Bonding: A Critical Requirement |
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194 | (1) |
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195 | (3) |
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198 | (3) |
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Bonding and Committed Relationships |
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201 | (1) |
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Tools for Forming Bonds of Intimacy |
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202 | (4) |
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206 | (3) |
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New Forms of Relationship |
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209 | (10) |
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209 | (1) |
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The Characteristics of a Conscious, Committed, Cooperative Relationship |
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210 | (1) |
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Nourishing and Toxic Relationships |
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211 | (1) |
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Tools for Creating New Forms of Relationship |
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212 | (5) |
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217 | (2) |
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Healing the Co-dependent Society |
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219 | (11) |
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Healing Society by Healing Yourself |
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219 | (1) |
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Healing Society Through Committed Relationships |
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220 | (1) |
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Healing Society Through Community |
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220 | (2) |
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Healing Society Through Servant Leadership |
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222 | (1) |
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Tools for Healing the Co-dependent Society |
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223 | (5) |
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228 | (2) |
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How We Changed Our Co-dependent Patterns |
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230 | (13) |
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230 | (3) |
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233 | (3) |
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236 | (1) |
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236 | (2) |
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The Journey to Interdependence |
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238 | (2) |
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A New Understanding of Co-dependency |
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240 | (1) |
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Our Perspective on Relationships |
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241 | (2) |
| Bibliography |
|
243 | |